Monday, December 13, 2010

On Linguistic Sedinery and Other Canuck-Based Descriptors

Update: records of the word "sedinery" being spoken have been produced that predate all the previous times I've heard it. It's possible it predates the English language itself. One commenter suggested it may have roots in Norse mythology and language.

Ever since he replaced Tommy Larscheid in the second game of the season, Team 1040 commentator Dave Tomlinson's frequent use of the term sedinery (to describe the Sedins' hockey blood magic) has become one of his most enjoyable phrases. Unfortunately, debate has sprung up over who originally coined this amusing term. Is it a Tomlinson original? Certainly not.

Pass it to Bulis has been using the term "wizardous sedinerie" since the Every Goal series in mid-September. Our use predates Tomlinson's. Is he a closeted Bulie?

More than likely, no (unless he's smart enough to know brilliant blogging when he sees it, natch). It was probably passed to him by Vancouver Sun writer Iain MacIntyre, whose earliest use of the word dates back an April 19 playoff article titled Kings' Drew Doughty Quickly Learning Sedinery. Though I generated the term spontaneously of MacIntyre, Tomlinson probably got it from his media colleague, not from the Internet.

But this article isn't about getting credit for made-up words (especially since I can't have it). Instead, this article is for to celebrate the invention of words. It happens all the time in Vancouver. Let's take a look at--and define--some other Canuck-based linguistic inventions.


1. In the manner of Kevin Bieksa.
The bieksallent boss was sued for sexual harassment after employees complained about his inappropriate pinching.

1. Magical, unexpected passing, in the manner of Henrik and Daniel Sedin.
With no proven sexual contact, the infection was a baffling case of sedinery.


1. In the manner of Ryan Kesler.
Upon discovering Canadians were a kind, gentle people, the young man put aside his keslerian prejudices.

1. In the manner of Sami Salo.
Nobody is more salodious than that guy; he once broke his arm waving goodbye to a friend.



1. In the manner of Mason Raymond.
The sports car owner had his license revoked for raymonstrative driving, after rear-ending another vehicle when he failed to slow down and pass.


1. In the manner of Roberto Luongo.
My friend's luongous hair wreaked havoc on my pillow shams.

1. In the manner of Keith Ballard.
The teacher was disciplined after many students complained about his ballardinous misuse of a ruler.

Please feel free to incorporate these into your regular vocabulary. Fight your brain's resistance to accept them as real words. Hit it with something. Get ballardinous if you have to. If you understood these sentences, then these words have successfully transmitted meaning. Remember that there's no honour to this bastard language. Meaning, by any means, is all the English language aspires to. Embrace this sad truth.

Coincidentally, Iain MacIntyre yesterday wrote that Tomlinson coined "Sedinery". How confusing. I'm wondering if maybe Tomlinson, MacIntyre, I and the word itself, became acquainted magically, without ever speaking, in which case it would be, ironically, a case of linguistic Sedinery.

And so we've come full circle.


  1. Beautiful.

    There is a tear in my eye and a glow in my heart. It started from Bieksallent all the way down. Well done.

  2. My grandma was always kind of bieksallent.

  3. Ballardinian sounds much better.

    Great post nonetheless.

  4. I was thinking today felt a little Hamhuisesque, it being the man's birthday.

  5. Rypienien
    1. In the manner of Rick Rypien.
    My colleague just cleared out her desk and nobody has heard any explanation as to why. All very rypinien.

  6. @11:5am Anonymous
    Ballardinous sounds really good if you put the emphasis on the "lard" syllable. Not unlike platitudinous.

    @12pm Anonymous
    I would go for Hamhuisical.

  7. Schneiderous: adjective
    1. causing controversy or scandal between two people

  8. I'll do you one better.

    1. Controversial, redheaded.
    Judas is the most schneiderous character in Catholicism.

  9. Awesome! Glad to have contributed to the crystallization of a post.

    Let's get historical:

    to McLean
    verb (int.)
    1. To remain on one's feet no matter the consequences.

    "Please take a seat once you enter the vehicle -- the driver is not responsible for injuries sustained while McLeaning."

    to Odjick
    1. To strike [an object, person, etc.] in detriment of a greater goal.

    "I was just about to get us all drinks on the house, then buddy over there had to go Odjick the bouncer and we all got thrown out."

    to Ron
    verb - present participle "Ronning"
    1. To pass through barriers due to a diminutive size.
    "There was no way I could sneak under the turnstile, but Jim's been Ronning around since he was a toddler."

    1. Featuring a slow, leisurely feel or pace.
    "I have so many errands to run, but it's hard to get motivated on a Murzyn Sunday afternoon."

    1. Situation arising from a loss of temper, bout of anger, etc.
    "All the guy said was he thought your girlfriend was pretty. Why did you have to make such a big Momesso out of it all?"

    Not a Canuck, but Canuck-related:

    adverb [many people misspell it "McSorely" anyway]
    1. Committed in a manner that puts a sudden or premature end to an endeavor.

    "I knew that show business was tough, I just didn't think I'd go out so McSorley."

  10. Hilarious.

    If you don't go to the comments, you miss half the fun of PITB.

  11. Bonus sentence:

    Some people are so bieksallent they develop hemorrhoids.

  12. Although people might be so bieksallent that they develop hemorrhoids, I hear that it may also result in quite a bit of biekscrement.

  13. Dave Tomlison has been using the term since January, according to a comment on this Nucks Misconduct post dated January 8.

  14. Hansenesque

    1. In speech - when one's words come out squeaky and high pitched.

    "When Kevin went to ask Sally to the dance his hopes were dashed when all he could muster was a hansenesque squeal"

  15. I hereby deem this post

  16. you know the canucks coined the term "cougar" as in older female wanting a younger male eh?

  17. Jan Bulis: to underachieve or fail.

  18. Torresian: Of large, bulgy eyeballs.
    The frog stared down its prey with his Torresian eyes.

  19. Malhotrous: Something that makes another thing better, without being overly noticable.
    "I don't know what you put in this cake, but it's very Malhotrous!"


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